Friday, October 06, 2006
Psychoanalyze this!
Lot of Issues with a capital I going on in today's Roger Report; the kind of issues that one usually pays to discuss with someone while reclining on a couch or for free on Dr. Phil. Clark, decked out in his favorite brown suit jacket and glasses (his hot nerd look, aka The "Clark's Kent"), was ostensibly reporting on the fact that today is the last day for parents to register their children to ride the school bus. In other words moms and dads, if you don't fill out some more paperwork, your kids are hangin' with you for the rest of the day. First, does anyone else find this revelation to be more than a little depressing? Am I the only person on earth that still entertained the idea that the school bus just kind of knew where you lived, like Santa Claus or Hewlett-Packard. As if anyone watching the morning news (versus, say, cartoons) needed a reminder that they weren't five years old any more, today we're alerted to the fact that even the school bus is wrapped in bureaucratic red tape. Happy Friday!
But I digress. The real Issues that I wanted to discuss had nothing to do with my own Peter Pan complex, but the fact that Rog clearly had some childhood stuff going on. For example, today we learned that his father told him if he leaned out of a moving bus window, he might get his head cut off if he hit a telephone pole when the bus made a turn. An excellent point and one that could have easily prompted Roger to become a serial killer. We also learned that his mother (isn't it always the mothers?) made him take the subway instead of the bus during high school, a fact that seemed to get under Clark's skin. I say kudos to Mrs. Clark for keeping her son's head on his body and his pride intact since riding the bus until you're just about in college doesn't exactly reel in the chicks. Rog, you have your mom and the A train to thank for that wedding band on your finger.
We also discovered that Roger thinks that there's nothing more depressing than an empty school bus. I think what he meant to say was there's nothing more depressing than a school bus. Empty or otherwise, the big yellow bus - especially when looked at as a guillotine- is not exactly upbeat (and don't even get me started on the short bus). Let's hope that Roger's "Clark Kent" is planning on changing into some tights for some Superman action because this Friday needs a little saving.
But I digress. The real Issues that I wanted to discuss had nothing to do with my own Peter Pan complex, but the fact that Rog clearly had some childhood stuff going on. For example, today we learned that his father told him if he leaned out of a moving bus window, he might get his head cut off if he hit a telephone pole when the bus made a turn. An excellent point and one that could have easily prompted Roger to become a serial killer. We also learned that his mother (isn't it always the mothers?) made him take the subway instead of the bus during high school, a fact that seemed to get under Clark's skin. I say kudos to Mrs. Clark for keeping her son's head on his body and his pride intact since riding the bus until you're just about in college doesn't exactly reel in the chicks. Rog, you have your mom and the A train to thank for that wedding band on your finger.
We also discovered that Roger thinks that there's nothing more depressing than an empty school bus. I think what he meant to say was there's nothing more depressing than a school bus. Empty or otherwise, the big yellow bus - especially when looked at as a guillotine- is not exactly upbeat (and don't even get me started on the short bus). Let's hope that Roger's "Clark Kent" is planning on changing into some tights for some Superman action because this Friday needs a little saving.
# posted by Unknown @ 8:42 AM 
